Samurai and I were really positive that everything will be approved in time for us to start building later this year so I started calling around for the prices of shipping containers to house our materials on the land.
Most companies I called referred me to Mediterranean Shipping Company for purchase options. When I called, the price maxed around $15K including payment to Customs and to a driver to deliver the container to our location. I also called a company that rented containers and even containers converted to offices but their $18K price to rent the bare container for one month was the same cost to purchase! Why? I do not know but we knew we will obviously be purchasing one. We therefore had to decide if we were willing to go through the hassle of buying it directly from the shipping company to save that $3K.
My cousin who recently completed her house had a novel idea of purchasing an old run-down trailer attachment for next to nothing in price and she cleaned out and lined the inside. It had doors and windows just like a container office but just when we thought about probably offering her a rental payment to use it as our storage, she decides to expand her newly built house.
Did I say this woman is crazy? She is. After building her single-storey house, she decides to add a floor. Yes she built her foundation for this, but she had a roof, not a first-floor decking over her head. That means she now has to raise her roof, if it could even be used again, and add a next storey.
In the mean time, we decided to visit the land to check on the plants because well, we kind of abandoned all our hundreds of dollars in plants. Of course, the land was overgrown with thick and tall grass. We could hardly venture far onto it to see the plants. From afar we saw a coconut tree struggling to grow and to the front, our sugar cane stalk was doing well. Other than that, the property looked like some wild forest. Sadly, we decided we were not going to even bother to trim or attend to these plants. Our plan for a lush garden when we moved in will just have to be squashed.
We did notice a storage container at the beginning of the development though. Christmas present? No. It seems another property-owner in the development planned to build as a lot about three down from ours was cleared of all grass and somewhat leveled! Yay! I was excited because we'll have neighbours and it also brought more hope to the area and value increasing even more.
When I got home, I watched the plans that showed the lots and the proposed drains. I realised that the drains were designed to run off into the pond which was a bit of a concern to me. Samurai decided to call the owner of the development regarding an update on the WASA water connections and drainage and he explained that WASA was currently doing an expansion project in the area but the drains were our responsibilty. I was confused. I called the Couva/Tabaquite/Talparo Regional Corporation a few days later to find out if they did drainage or if we were responsible and they explained that they only do the roadside drainage. However (and I must mention how helpful the staff at this agency was), the inspector did explain that earthen drains are just as good as concrete drains so we are not required to construct actual drains with the construction of the house. This was a relief and running a box drain along the perimeter of an acre of land would be something we just could not afford, however, we still needed to devise a plan for proper drainage on the lot into these earthen drains that already existed.
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Monday, September 9, 2013
Circa 2012: New quotation
So I'm getting closer and closer to present day.
Note to self: Improve on your writing skills, lol
We heard back from Foundation Guy two weeks after. In fact, Samurai did and called me hastily while at work to get pen and paper to take down the list of items quoted:
140 lengths of 5/8" Corrugated Steel
180 lengths of 1/2" Corrugated Steel
120 lengths of 3/8" Plain Steel
1400 6"x8"x12" Concrete blocks
30lbs Tying wire
18 lengths of 1"x4"x14' Pitch Pine
8 lengths of 2"x2"x14' Pitch Pine
5 lbs of 2 1/2" Nails
2 lbs 2" Nails
2 loads of Gravel
40 bags of Cement
1 load of Plaster Cement
35 cubic metres of Poured Cement (Cement Truck)*
We also had the option of Foundation Guy mixing the cement himself instead of the Cement Truck which would replace that item with:
4 loads of Gravel
140 bags of Cement
So, this of course got me excited because I could almost see my foundation built in front of me. I created a nice little spreadsheet and started calling the popular hardware stores and a few random ones I chose from the telephone directory, informing them of my desire to get a quote. They all gave me their fax number to send it across. Some were more pleasant than others but I honestly didn't care, cost is what mattered at this point.
Some of the places I faxed the quotation to:
Central Wholesale Stores
Azad Abass Ali Hardware
Bhagwansingh's Hardware
Southern Wholesale Stores
Gopaul Lands Hardware
Ramlagan's General Hardware
Roopnarine Hardware
Quite a few of them did not sell gravel and the poured cement. I guess you need to have a really large storage facility to sell something like this. Some of them instead recommended I call the cement companies like Trinidad Cement Ltd and Readymix directly for that quote but the few that did, included a transportation cost that was of course cheaper the closer your destination was from their office. The level of difficulty in getting the cement to the location on the property can also influence the cost.
I was surprised at how quickly I got back some of the quotes. Some even called to discuss the purpose and other little tidbits of information I needed and left out. One error I made was putting plaster cement when it should read plaster sand.
The average price from the quotes I got back (excluding the gravel and poured cement) was around $35K. The few that were able to quote for the gravel gave an average price of $2,500.00. Only one gave a quote for the plaster sand at $2,000.00 and the poured cement averaged $28,000.00
I also contacted the cement companies but for nothing I could find my notes with these quotes. As soon as I do I will update this post.
Anywhoo. The total cost from what I do remember for the gravel, poured cement and the quotes on these other items above brought our material cost of roughly $100K. This plus the $50K in labour by Foundation Guy and minor unforeseen expenses gives us a rough estimate of $180K for the foundation. This was doable but this was also based on quotes at this time. With such an unpredictable construction sector and the boldface profiteering of some of these businessmen, we still had to re-do this entire quotation process closer to the time of purchase but at least we had a base figure to work with for now.
So, after receiving these quotes, Samurai and I were ready to submit our plans to Town and Country. We went over all the minor details again and took a deep breath an agreed, this is what we wanted.
We sent the plans over to the draughtsman via e-mail and we called him the next day. I guess with our history of postponing this decision, he had to confirm with us a few times if this is what we wanted with no expected changes. We confirmed
He then stated that he will work on them as soon as possible and briefed us again on the cost and process for submitting on our behalf.
I was crazy nervous.
Note to self: Improve on your writing skills, lol
We heard back from Foundation Guy two weeks after. In fact, Samurai did and called me hastily while at work to get pen and paper to take down the list of items quoted:
140 lengths of 5/8" Corrugated Steel
180 lengths of 1/2" Corrugated Steel
120 lengths of 3/8" Plain Steel
1400 6"x8"x12" Concrete blocks
30lbs Tying wire
18 lengths of 1"x4"x14' Pitch Pine
8 lengths of 2"x2"x14' Pitch Pine
5 lbs of 2 1/2" Nails
2 lbs 2" Nails
2 loads of Gravel
40 bags of Cement
1 load of Plaster Cement
35 cubic metres of Poured Cement (Cement Truck)*
We also had the option of Foundation Guy mixing the cement himself instead of the Cement Truck which would replace that item with:
4 loads of Gravel
140 bags of Cement
So, this of course got me excited because I could almost see my foundation built in front of me. I created a nice little spreadsheet and started calling the popular hardware stores and a few random ones I chose from the telephone directory, informing them of my desire to get a quote. They all gave me their fax number to send it across. Some were more pleasant than others but I honestly didn't care, cost is what mattered at this point.
Some of the places I faxed the quotation to:
Central Wholesale Stores
Azad Abass Ali Hardware
Bhagwansingh's Hardware
Southern Wholesale Stores
Gopaul Lands Hardware
Ramlagan's General Hardware
Roopnarine Hardware
Quite a few of them did not sell gravel and the poured cement. I guess you need to have a really large storage facility to sell something like this. Some of them instead recommended I call the cement companies like Trinidad Cement Ltd and Readymix directly for that quote but the few that did, included a transportation cost that was of course cheaper the closer your destination was from their office. The level of difficulty in getting the cement to the location on the property can also influence the cost.
I was surprised at how quickly I got back some of the quotes. Some even called to discuss the purpose and other little tidbits of information I needed and left out. One error I made was putting plaster cement when it should read plaster sand.
The average price from the quotes I got back (excluding the gravel and poured cement) was around $35K. The few that were able to quote for the gravel gave an average price of $2,500.00. Only one gave a quote for the plaster sand at $2,000.00 and the poured cement averaged $28,000.00
I also contacted the cement companies but for nothing I could find my notes with these quotes. As soon as I do I will update this post.
Anywhoo. The total cost from what I do remember for the gravel, poured cement and the quotes on these other items above brought our material cost of roughly $100K. This plus the $50K in labour by Foundation Guy and minor unforeseen expenses gives us a rough estimate of $180K for the foundation. This was doable but this was also based on quotes at this time. With such an unpredictable construction sector and the boldface profiteering of some of these businessmen, we still had to re-do this entire quotation process closer to the time of purchase but at least we had a base figure to work with for now.
So, after receiving these quotes, Samurai and I were ready to submit our plans to Town and Country. We went over all the minor details again and took a deep breath an agreed, this is what we wanted.
We sent the plans over to the draughtsman via e-mail and we called him the next day. I guess with our history of postponing this decision, he had to confirm with us a few times if this is what we wanted with no expected changes. We confirmed
He then stated that he will work on them as soon as possible and briefed us again on the cost and process for submitting on our behalf.
I was crazy nervous.
Circa 2012: Foundation Guy?
Sooo (insert shame-face smiley here) we either heard wrong or assumed our own thing but some type of miscommunication occurred regarding this foundation and retaining wall.
After discussing the new version of the plan done by the draughtsman, we spoke about the retaining wall issue, only to find out that it is PART of the foundation structure. Yes, it will make the cost we averaged for the foundation a bit more but it will not be a huge and separate cost that we need to pay.
You would not believe how relieved I was but Samurai played it cool like 'oh, I knew that all along'... *roll eyes*... so why did you get a quote from that company eh? eh?
So anyways, the cost of the foundation that was quoted by the draughtsman INCLUDES the retaining wall but was still too much for us. After speaking with my new-homeowner-cousin and her boyfriend about all the costs and headaches attached to building your own house, they too were a bit doubtful about this $280,000.00 quotation. Even though they put us on to this draughtsman, they joked that maybe it was the contractor in him quoting us on that price.
Now, my cousin is a red 'oman. You know when I say "red 'oman" and not "red woman", she aint easy. She can tough it up like any other man and as her boyfriend admitted, is why she oversaw the entire construction process for their house and not him. He is too soft-spoken and patient, Samurai and I are their opposite. Anyways, she recommended a new guy for a quote. He actually did her foundation, which I am now learning about... jeez, explaining that even though the draughtsman was great at floor plans, this other guy had decades of experience with foundations and more specifically, retaining walls. She said he is very thorough and will quote his material down to the exact brick.
My cousin isn't afraid to really pull-up people when they're slacking off and she admitted that she didn't even have to do any of that with this guy. He actually did the retaining wall for a piece of land her sister purchased years ago. The back of the lot was several feet higher than the roadway and she wanted to address the structural issues as she planned on building soon when she returns from the States. Another person purchased the lot next to hers and did the same thing, built a retaining wall to the back but when the heavy rains came earlier in the year, and there was flooding and houses sliding down the hills, and roads crumbling like cookies, the neighbour's wall crumbled with it but her sister's wall remained strong.
Well you know, Samurai and I were sold! My cousin's boyfriend called the guy (now dubbed 'Foundation Guy') to brief him and to let him know to expect our call. I had Samurai call him the very next day, because well, I'm a socially challenged.
This guy was also very pleasant and friendly and we arranged to view the land the following Saturday.
On our way that Saturday, he called Samurai to say his car was down and wanted to know if we could pick him up in the East. When we pulled up, he did not seem like any man who did construction. He jumped in an I immediately felt very comfortable speaking with him as we discussed the house and showed him our floor plan (to date) along the drive.
When we arrived, our daughter was fast asleep so we initially stayed near the van while Samurai talked about random stuff like steel options and the issue with the retaining wall. I am so obsessed with learning everything I could about construction but the more Samurai and the Foundation Guy spoke the more they wandered further into the land preventing me from hearing what they were saying, ugh.
From afar, I saw Foundation Guy pound on the soil with his foot and stooped down for a bit for further inspection I assume. Sigh, I wish I could read his mind because according to sipreal.com, we should have gotten an engineer to do a soil analysis especially with this very thick clay soil, but crazy us, we just went with the fact that we know it's clay soil so we don't need someone to tell us that again.
On our way back, Foundation Guy explained he is really simple. He just wants to come in and do the work and we source the materials and have them ready for him. He said he will work out the item list and quote and get back to us in a week. We were happy to hear that because just the night before we discussed purchasing the materials and finding the labour as being the only cheaper option to this special foundation that we need.
We waited patiently and I kept thinking positive that he would give us a quote that was doable in order to complete our plans and finally submit them for approval.
After discussing the new version of the plan done by the draughtsman, we spoke about the retaining wall issue, only to find out that it is PART of the foundation structure. Yes, it will make the cost we averaged for the foundation a bit more but it will not be a huge and separate cost that we need to pay.
You would not believe how relieved I was but Samurai played it cool like 'oh, I knew that all along'... *roll eyes*... so why did you get a quote from that company eh? eh?
So anyways, the cost of the foundation that was quoted by the draughtsman INCLUDES the retaining wall but was still too much for us. After speaking with my new-homeowner-cousin and her boyfriend about all the costs and headaches attached to building your own house, they too were a bit doubtful about this $280,000.00 quotation. Even though they put us on to this draughtsman, they joked that maybe it was the contractor in him quoting us on that price.
Now, my cousin is a red 'oman. You know when I say "red 'oman" and not "red woman", she aint easy. She can tough it up like any other man and as her boyfriend admitted, is why she oversaw the entire construction process for their house and not him. He is too soft-spoken and patient, Samurai and I are their opposite. Anyways, she recommended a new guy for a quote. He actually did her foundation, which I am now learning about... jeez, explaining that even though the draughtsman was great at floor plans, this other guy had decades of experience with foundations and more specifically, retaining walls. She said he is very thorough and will quote his material down to the exact brick.
My cousin isn't afraid to really pull-up people when they're slacking off and she admitted that she didn't even have to do any of that with this guy. He actually did the retaining wall for a piece of land her sister purchased years ago. The back of the lot was several feet higher than the roadway and she wanted to address the structural issues as she planned on building soon when she returns from the States. Another person purchased the lot next to hers and did the same thing, built a retaining wall to the back but when the heavy rains came earlier in the year, and there was flooding and houses sliding down the hills, and roads crumbling like cookies, the neighbour's wall crumbled with it but her sister's wall remained strong.
Well you know, Samurai and I were sold! My cousin's boyfriend called the guy (now dubbed 'Foundation Guy') to brief him and to let him know to expect our call. I had Samurai call him the very next day, because well, I'm a socially challenged.
This guy was also very pleasant and friendly and we arranged to view the land the following Saturday.
On our way that Saturday, he called Samurai to say his car was down and wanted to know if we could pick him up in the East. When we pulled up, he did not seem like any man who did construction. He jumped in an I immediately felt very comfortable speaking with him as we discussed the house and showed him our floor plan (to date) along the drive.
When we arrived, our daughter was fast asleep so we initially stayed near the van while Samurai talked about random stuff like steel options and the issue with the retaining wall. I am so obsessed with learning everything I could about construction but the more Samurai and the Foundation Guy spoke the more they wandered further into the land preventing me from hearing what they were saying, ugh.
From afar, I saw Foundation Guy pound on the soil with his foot and stooped down for a bit for further inspection I assume. Sigh, I wish I could read his mind because according to sipreal.com, we should have gotten an engineer to do a soil analysis especially with this very thick clay soil, but crazy us, we just went with the fact that we know it's clay soil so we don't need someone to tell us that again.
On our way back, Foundation Guy explained he is really simple. He just wants to come in and do the work and we source the materials and have them ready for him. He said he will work out the item list and quote and get back to us in a week. We were happy to hear that because just the night before we discussed purchasing the materials and finding the labour as being the only cheaper option to this special foundation that we need.
We waited patiently and I kept thinking positive that he would give us a quote that was doable in order to complete our plans and finally submit them for approval.
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Circa 2012: #Motivation
Today is probably one of the saddest days in my life and one of the happiest at the same time.
Today is my daughter's first birthday.
I cried for so long today because I never pictured it to be this way. You would think that something so special would bring everyone together but instead it tears everything apart.
Note to self and others: If you're faced with an issue, don't assume that person is the problem. Look at yourself first and see if you are a contributing factor.
Through the sadness however, Samurai and I were still able to have a great day. We ignored the negatives and gave our daughter the love, joy and happiness she deserves. We are still adjusting to having this little person invade every ounce of our time, privacy and freedom, but we wouldn't have it any other way.
What also turned today from sad to happy is that it definitely was the motivation to get started with this house. It was like the whip on the horse's ass to start planning and scheduling getting it off the ground.
That night we sat on the bed going over all the little details and corrections to the initial plan done by the draughtsman. We went over our budget again thanks to this ridiculously expensive daycare and made a rough timeline. We just wanted our own home.
By the end of that night we finalised our plans and was ready to have the draughtsman do the final version for submission to Town and Country, however, the issue with the retaining walls is what we really had to address. We decided that we could probably pay for this from our savings and take the construction loan from TTMF for everything else.
The draughtsman was also a contractor, so we decided to ask him to quote us on the cost for the foundation alone with this retaining wall issue so that depending on the cost, we will know if we can just build the entire shell of the house (no fixtures, furniture or furnishings except for the Master, our daughter's room and one bathroom) or if we will have to just do the upper floor and eventually build downstairs in the future.
When we contacted the draughtsman, he said he will need to go view the land again for the quote. In the meantime, Samurai called up a random company who met us that weekend to quote us on the retaining wall. His quote: $100,000.00
I just felt like throwing in the towel. We couldn't pay for the foundation AND this retaining wall. It was just too much. This meant we had to go back once again to the drawing board and reduce the size of the house. I probably should just take my mother's advice and build a small pool house, with a pool and live on the floor.
We waited and waited on the second quote from the draughtsman but clearly he was busy as he kept pushing back the date he'll have it ready by. Some good few weeks later, he sent an e-mail with the amount... $280,000.00 for the foundation and retaining wall.
Someone. Get me a tent. I give up
Today is my daughter's first birthday.
I cried for so long today because I never pictured it to be this way. You would think that something so special would bring everyone together but instead it tears everything apart.
Note to self and others: If you're faced with an issue, don't assume that person is the problem. Look at yourself first and see if you are a contributing factor.
Through the sadness however, Samurai and I were still able to have a great day. We ignored the negatives and gave our daughter the love, joy and happiness she deserves. We are still adjusting to having this little person invade every ounce of our time, privacy and freedom, but we wouldn't have it any other way.
What also turned today from sad to happy is that it definitely was the motivation to get started with this house. It was like the whip on the horse's ass to start planning and scheduling getting it off the ground.
That night we sat on the bed going over all the little details and corrections to the initial plan done by the draughtsman. We went over our budget again thanks to this ridiculously expensive daycare and made a rough timeline. We just wanted our own home.
By the end of that night we finalised our plans and was ready to have the draughtsman do the final version for submission to Town and Country, however, the issue with the retaining walls is what we really had to address. We decided that we could probably pay for this from our savings and take the construction loan from TTMF for everything else.
The draughtsman was also a contractor, so we decided to ask him to quote us on the cost for the foundation alone with this retaining wall issue so that depending on the cost, we will know if we can just build the entire shell of the house (no fixtures, furniture or furnishings except for the Master, our daughter's room and one bathroom) or if we will have to just do the upper floor and eventually build downstairs in the future.
When we contacted the draughtsman, he said he will need to go view the land again for the quote. In the meantime, Samurai called up a random company who met us that weekend to quote us on the retaining wall. His quote: $100,000.00
I just felt like throwing in the towel. We couldn't pay for the foundation AND this retaining wall. It was just too much. This meant we had to go back once again to the drawing board and reduce the size of the house. I probably should just take my mother's advice and build a small pool house, with a pool and live on the floor.
We waited and waited on the second quote from the draughtsman but clearly he was busy as he kept pushing back the date he'll have it ready by. Some good few weeks later, he sent an e-mail with the amount... $280,000.00 for the foundation and retaining wall.
Someone. Get me a tent. I give up
Circa 2012: Progress?
There was clearly not going to be any progress with our dream house for 2011. Samurai was still heavy into culinary school, I was still finishing up my semester at school before our daughter came and outside of that, my time was well spent on my laptop fiddling around with my Live Interior program.
One good thing... While houses were built on the first two lots of the development, we really didn't know how sales on the remaining lots were going. I then noticed a listing for the development on a well-know website and there were only a few more lots being advertised and the value increased to $1.1M!!! The agent that put us on to this property was right about the potential. This meant that the property value increased by 16% in two years and it would be even more for us because of the introductory price we got. Score!
My cousin's house not too far from us was almost completed and it was so exciting to get the tour. She gave us lots of pointers and tips and tricks and suggested some key people for the different aspects of the construction process.
That night we reviewed the changes to our plan and called up the draughtsman she recommended. We thought he might have forgotten about us but he didn't. She was right about the fact that he really listens to what you need and your wish list...
We again discussed the costs and process to start designing the house and arranged to meet him by the land so he'll get an idea of any structural issues that might occur. He seemed really laid back and patient and answered all our questions.
He mentioned that because the land sloped on both sides, it will be best to include a retaining wall to the left and back of the house. This meant a slight increase again in what we budgeted for thanks to this new retaining wall cost.
The more he spoke the more it seemed our costs were adding up. So at the same time, I saw my dream home slipping away again.
We gave the draughtsman prints of the final plan I developed after slaving on my little ole program. We also had two internal staircases. One was 4ft wide because Samurai believes that a wide staircase will be needed for lugging large furniture and another was 2ft wide only to find out that the minimum width of a staircase must be 3ft and we would never get it approved. He suggested we converted that second staircase to a spiral. Everything else he said should be okay.
He promised to quickly send across a completed version for review which he did in a few weeks... and after a few calls but his changes were a bit too... well, I just didn't feel it.
Samurai left the inspection and feedback up to me and even though much of the layout was the same, the upper floor had this awkward new hallway that started to make the house very maze-ish. Samurai and I are also very particular about the size of the rooms and the kitchen for one just wouldn't work.
Anyways, we made some changes and sent it back to him but the more we thought about cost, the more we wondered if we would be able to build the entire house, of settle for just the upper floor for now. Hey, when you're in Central, do as the Central people do.
We decided to call the draughtsman and tell him to hold on any further work until we got our budget and costing in order.
One good thing... While houses were built on the first two lots of the development, we really didn't know how sales on the remaining lots were going. I then noticed a listing for the development on a well-know website and there were only a few more lots being advertised and the value increased to $1.1M!!! The agent that put us on to this property was right about the potential. This meant that the property value increased by 16% in two years and it would be even more for us because of the introductory price we got. Score!
My cousin's house not too far from us was almost completed and it was so exciting to get the tour. She gave us lots of pointers and tips and tricks and suggested some key people for the different aspects of the construction process.
That night we reviewed the changes to our plan and called up the draughtsman she recommended. We thought he might have forgotten about us but he didn't. She was right about the fact that he really listens to what you need and your wish list...
We again discussed the costs and process to start designing the house and arranged to meet him by the land so he'll get an idea of any structural issues that might occur. He seemed really laid back and patient and answered all our questions.
He mentioned that because the land sloped on both sides, it will be best to include a retaining wall to the left and back of the house. This meant a slight increase again in what we budgeted for thanks to this new retaining wall cost.
The more he spoke the more it seemed our costs were adding up. So at the same time, I saw my dream home slipping away again.
We gave the draughtsman prints of the final plan I developed after slaving on my little ole program. We also had two internal staircases. One was 4ft wide because Samurai believes that a wide staircase will be needed for lugging large furniture and another was 2ft wide only to find out that the minimum width of a staircase must be 3ft and we would never get it approved. He suggested we converted that second staircase to a spiral. Everything else he said should be okay.
He promised to quickly send across a completed version for review which he did in a few weeks... and after a few calls but his changes were a bit too... well, I just didn't feel it.
Samurai left the inspection and feedback up to me and even though much of the layout was the same, the upper floor had this awkward new hallway that started to make the house very maze-ish. Samurai and I are also very particular about the size of the rooms and the kitchen for one just wouldn't work.
Anyways, we made some changes and sent it back to him but the more we thought about cost, the more we wondered if we would be able to build the entire house, of settle for just the upper floor for now. Hey, when you're in Central, do as the Central people do.
We decided to call the draughtsman and tell him to hold on any further work until we got our budget and costing in order.
Circa 2012: A preview of the Central life
We. Have. Moved.
Samurai's mother will be babysitting for us when I go back out to work in February. I do not want to go back out to work.
So, on New Year's Day 2012, we moved in with my in-laws, once again sharing a room that is even smaller than what we shared before.
I guess like all new or first-time mothers, I was a bit over-protective of my daughter. In fact, I was a bit greedy in sharing her so one great thing is that we got her crib to fit through the doorway so she can sleep in the same room with us. Back at my mother's house, she graciously gave up her spare bedroom for the crib as it just couldn't fit through the narrow hallway. So I used to abandon Samurai to sleep in her room almost every night even though we had a brand new, functional monitor, lol.
So baby in our room. I am happy. Did I say I did not want to go back out to work?
Living in Central was cool and not much different from the West in terms of being in a house all day dreading my return to work. The only hard part was having one bathroom for about six people in a house. At my mother's there were two for four people but I think them adjusting to a new baby crying all hours of the night was tougher than anything else.
When February came, I was back out to work, unfortunately.
I wasn't getting any sleep because my daughter clearly knew I now had to get up at 4:00am instead of 6. This meant that in addition to going to sleep at 11 or 12 at night, she was waking me up at 2 or 3 in the morning giving me just 2 to 3 hours of sleep as I had no choice but to start getting ready when I managed to put her back down to sleep.
I would be so paranoid driving to work because my eyes would be closing down on me, but at least I got good parking spots!
Unfortunately three months later, our Central life and free babysitting was cut short when my mother-in-law damaged her knee. She was persistent that she could still do it though, but she needed the rest, and I did not feel comfortable putting that strain on her.
Due to Samurai's unpredictable work schedule, a daycare close by in Port of Spain was therefore the only option, but unfortunately, this decision meant a large chunk of our savings evaporating every month. All of these daycares were ridiculously expensive and the cheaper one's were all filled or were too unkempt for me to even consider leaving my child there.
So back to Diego we went with less money in our pockets to start our dream home with now three more years before TTMF's deadline to start building on the land.
Samurai's mother will be babysitting for us when I go back out to work in February. I do not want to go back out to work.
So, on New Year's Day 2012, we moved in with my in-laws, once again sharing a room that is even smaller than what we shared before.
I guess like all new or first-time mothers, I was a bit over-protective of my daughter. In fact, I was a bit greedy in sharing her so one great thing is that we got her crib to fit through the doorway so she can sleep in the same room with us. Back at my mother's house, she graciously gave up her spare bedroom for the crib as it just couldn't fit through the narrow hallway. So I used to abandon Samurai to sleep in her room almost every night even though we had a brand new, functional monitor, lol.
So baby in our room. I am happy. Did I say I did not want to go back out to work?
Living in Central was cool and not much different from the West in terms of being in a house all day dreading my return to work. The only hard part was having one bathroom for about six people in a house. At my mother's there were two for four people but I think them adjusting to a new baby crying all hours of the night was tougher than anything else.
When February came, I was back out to work, unfortunately.
I wasn't getting any sleep because my daughter clearly knew I now had to get up at 4:00am instead of 6. This meant that in addition to going to sleep at 11 or 12 at night, she was waking me up at 2 or 3 in the morning giving me just 2 to 3 hours of sleep as I had no choice but to start getting ready when I managed to put her back down to sleep.
I would be so paranoid driving to work because my eyes would be closing down on me, but at least I got good parking spots!
Unfortunately three months later, our Central life and free babysitting was cut short when my mother-in-law damaged her knee. She was persistent that she could still do it though, but she needed the rest, and I did not feel comfortable putting that strain on her.
Due to Samurai's unpredictable work schedule, a daycare close by in Port of Spain was therefore the only option, but unfortunately, this decision meant a large chunk of our savings evaporating every month. All of these daycares were ridiculously expensive and the cheaper one's were all filled or were too unkempt for me to even consider leaving my child there.
So back to Diego we went with less money in our pockets to start our dream home with now three more years before TTMF's deadline to start building on the land.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Circa 2011: Be content with what you have
This post is just a rant thought that I wish to share
Two beautiful lights went out while I was pregnant and it really made me realise how every little second on this earth counts.
It made me realise that it doesn't make sense to dwell on the petty things.
It doesn't make sense to hold grudges and be mean to one another.
We need to stop competing with one another, seeking revenge, spreading bad thoughts and encouraging animosity.
I am not a sociable person. In fact, I call myself a social-handicap because I just do not know how to do the pleasantries, conversations and friendly banter. Anyone will describe me as the one who doh talk to nobody and it's true. I am a potential hermit. In fact, I will be the best damn hermit there ever was if given the chance.
But everyone comes with their own personality and we need to accept that everyone is different and see it as a challenge to look beyond what you are not accustomed to, and embrace what you can relate to.
You live and die in the same day. So just live.
Two beautiful lights went out while I was pregnant and it really made me realise how every little second on this earth counts.
It made me realise that it doesn't make sense to dwell on the petty things.
It doesn't make sense to hold grudges and be mean to one another.
We need to stop competing with one another, seeking revenge, spreading bad thoughts and encouraging animosity.
I am not a sociable person. In fact, I call myself a social-handicap because I just do not know how to do the pleasantries, conversations and friendly banter. Anyone will describe me as the one who doh talk to nobody and it's true. I am a potential hermit. In fact, I will be the best damn hermit there ever was if given the chance.
But everyone comes with their own personality and we need to accept that everyone is different and see it as a challenge to look beyond what you are not accustomed to, and embrace what you can relate to.
You live and die in the same day. So just live.
Circa 2011: And one makes three
Soooo. I. Am. Pregnant
Even though it was on my list of 'to-do's' lol, we decided that we would really aim to start the house thing this year and then focus on starting a family.
This unexpected surprise is still a welcome and we are going with the flow. I am just a bit worried about now squeezing a baby into this already tight room that Samurai and I share.
The pregnancy was pretty much uneventful and thanks to my very non-existent pregnancy cravings, my snacking expenditure wasn't very high :)
We have also been very resourceful regarding the items needed for the baby and pretty much arranged to ship a barrel from the States with all our necessities.
My cousin also started her house and gave us the contact for her draughtsman. We called him just to get an idea of the costs and procedures involved but the price per square foot that he quoted ($350-$400) was a bit of a shock.
Samurai was always so sure that if we just build the shell of our house, we'll spend no more than $500K and over the years we will eventually furnish to our liking. I always doubted it a little because when I browsed real estate listings in the country I would rarely find a house under $2M.
We therefore went back to the drawing board to re-design the house, decreasing the size and other splurges that we just couldn't afford.
By September our beautiful fat-cheeked baby girl was here and it was an unbelievable experience with much more to come.
Even though it was on my list of 'to-do's' lol, we decided that we would really aim to start the house thing this year and then focus on starting a family.
This unexpected surprise is still a welcome and we are going with the flow. I am just a bit worried about now squeezing a baby into this already tight room that Samurai and I share.
The pregnancy was pretty much uneventful and thanks to my very non-existent pregnancy cravings, my snacking expenditure wasn't very high :)
We have also been very resourceful regarding the items needed for the baby and pretty much arranged to ship a barrel from the States with all our necessities.
My cousin also started her house and gave us the contact for her draughtsman. We called him just to get an idea of the costs and procedures involved but the price per square foot that he quoted ($350-$400) was a bit of a shock.
Samurai was always so sure that if we just build the shell of our house, we'll spend no more than $500K and over the years we will eventually furnish to our liking. I always doubted it a little because when I browsed real estate listings in the country I would rarely find a house under $2M.
We therefore went back to the drawing board to re-design the house, decreasing the size and other splurges that we just couldn't afford.
By September our beautiful fat-cheeked baby girl was here and it was an unbelievable experience with much more to come.
Monday, September 2, 2013
A bit of advice
To all couples out there that can't wait to spend the rest of their lives together, I'm sorry to say it but: DO NOT LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS... It is a guaranteed death sentence for your relationship and marriage. If I could go back in time, I will ensure I have the house first and then the wedding.
I repeat: DO NOT LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS
The Americans had it right by making it taboo to still live at home when you turn eighteen. Sadly the real estate industry in this country really hinders that progress but you know what, hold strain. Save, Save, Save and if you really can't wait and can afford it. Rent. I usually do not support renting because according to my mother it's 'dead money' but if you want a relationship that is based on learing each other and growing together properly and positively without much external distractions, go for it.
No matter how great your in-laws are, you still need that level of privacy and openness to really express yourself to your significant other that you just cannot get while living under someone else's space and rules.
So take my dumb advice and DO NOT LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS
I repeat: DO NOT LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS
The Americans had it right by making it taboo to still live at home when you turn eighteen. Sadly the real estate industry in this country really hinders that progress but you know what, hold strain. Save, Save, Save and if you really can't wait and can afford it. Rent. I usually do not support renting because according to my mother it's 'dead money' but if you want a relationship that is based on learing each other and growing together properly and positively without much external distractions, go for it.
No matter how great your in-laws are, you still need that level of privacy and openness to really express yourself to your significant other that you just cannot get while living under someone else's space and rules.
So take my dumb advice and DO NOT LIVE WITH YOUR IN-LAWS
Circa 2010: Living off the land
We have kept in touch with the owner of the development who actually lives a few metres from us. He is a really cool and has been updating us on everything. He got the electricity poles in (woohoo) but was still working on the WASA connection to the property. He also has a tractor guy that comes in to cut the grass ever-so-often as I guess he wants to keep the property neat for potential buyers of the remaining lots but it's also a major plus for us for the time being.
As I mentioned before, I want a good bit of land with my house. The initial specifications of my dream house from secondary school included it being on no less than two lots. Growing up in the West, we never had much of a yard but my mother never let that keep her passion for gardening back. She has all the herbs a Trini needs to 'flavour the pot'.
This woman will plant in anything: bricks, buckets, old sinks, anything. We also had a Julie Mango tree growing in the most awkward of spaces with concrete all around its base but it still managed to produce a lot of juicy mangoes every year that everyone in the house would fight for and fall out with each other over.
When I first met Samurai's family and started to visit the house in Central, things were different. First off their house is one of those really beautifully old, rustic, colonial type houses surrounded by lush greenery. It's really lovely and every time I left, I left with bag of fruits, citrus, cakes, provision, juices... and anything and everything his very generous mother had. It was just in her nature to give away and having a yard with many mature trees made it even easier. My sisters would joke and ask me if I went to the market with all of the stuff I brought back and sadly, there was still a fight for the mangoes I got.
So now we have a whole acre and I envision Samurai and I having our dream house with a large and mature garden filled with fruit trees and provisions and herbs and a little of everything. I picture us with children climbing the trees and stuffing their bellies with mangoes and pommerac. I want to be able to get up on a Sunday morning and pick most of the items for that day's meal from my yard, down to chickens and all.
Samurai also shared this idea but wanted to start this 'garden' before the house came so that when we do move in, we'll have some trees to live off of. We wanted to be as self-sustainable as possible seeing that our finances would be limited so we started gathering plants from my mother-in-law, Samurai's friends and a few plants shops. We also bought a few items from the Government farm in St Augustine. They had very little stuff at the time but their prices were really good.
Now, my mother-in-law has a rich yard, yes, filled with lovely trees and plants, Maneuvering through her yard, however, was a bit much because no landscaping or even little walk paths were incorporated pretty much like anyone's yard in these areas. In fact, many Trinidadians don't 'fuss' about landscaping but thanks to HGTV and DIY channel, however, I want that landscaping with neat little walk paths and well-manicured lawn. So Samurai's plan to just pelt tree like mad in the soil didn't sit well with me but he convinced me with the idea of having Starch and Julie mangoes to my heart's content so we tried our best to determine the proposed location for the house and began to plant outside of that area.
We also found out about this organic plant shop called WaSamaki not too far from our soon-to-be home. They were really nice and helpful with a lot of rare fruits and plants for sale on their farm that your Tantie and Mammy used to talk about but were so rare to find that the prices made them a one-time 'splurge' purchase just to try it.
Our land was covered in very thick brush. At first I was a bit despondent and wondered what the hell we were getting ourselves in to. The high razor grass, weeds and vines were so strong and think that it felt like you were walking in quicksand just to get through. The soild was another concern. It was thick clay soil, thicker than my legs!!! lol. It was sticking to my brand new gardener boots like if I was making a mold. I wondered if this soil would cause a problem to build a house on because just digging a hole took sooo much effort. We found a few treasures though. The soil was laden with earth worms which is great for drainage and for the plants. We also found several Tumeric roots and watching the land from the roadway, it was obvious someone used to plant here a lot.
Anyways, once a week for a few weeks we rounded up Samurai's brothers and we all went down to cut pathways in the bush with a weed whacker with the poor thing struggling to perform. The more we went, the more I realised that with a good clearing, care and planning, this yard will be so beautiful.
We planted:
Citrus trees (lime, grapefruit, orange)
Starch and Julie mango (a must)
Soursop
West Indian Cherry
Carambola
Coffee
Governor Plum (this was different to what we thought it was, the big juicy bumpy plums are apparently called Jamaican Plum)
Sapodilla
Tamarind (sweet)
Pommerac
Caimate
Guava
Bay Leaf
Ley Ley
and much more
I would never think gardening was such a great workout. I think I lost a pound or two every time we went to do some work. The only thing I didn't do was use that whacker. I think when we establish our garden I need a lawn mower (ride-on preferably) because that thing is not designed for my body so we made a deal for when we got the house that he washes the clothes and I will cut the grass.
In fact we made a few deals:
He cooks and I will wash the wares
He scrubs the bathrooms and I will sweep and mop
The pond next to the back of our lot was very large so a section of the land was a bit swampy from the water that seeped in. We planted a few coconut trees in this area. Throughout the entire acre we dug holes and planted and weeded. My mother even came once to help us plant some stuff but I think she underestimated the work involved, lol.
Samurai's mother started some Breadfruit trees plants for us by slicing the root of her tree with a cutlass which made new shoots. We went to plant two of them but the next two weeks when we returned, one disappeared and the other died. We tried another time and that one disappeared too. Strange. Could someone be stealing our plants?
After we planted most of the stuff we had, our visits were just to go back with the tray of the van filled with bottles of water for the plants. We had to walk back and forth along the length of this land to water these plants which felt like torture at times but a few of them were really striving and the pride from seeing these little babies grow was motivation enough to continue.
As it got closer to Christmas however, the gardening slowed down to not at all. So all the plants, dead, stolen or thriving were out there to fend for themselves until the new year.
As I mentioned before, I want a good bit of land with my house. The initial specifications of my dream house from secondary school included it being on no less than two lots. Growing up in the West, we never had much of a yard but my mother never let that keep her passion for gardening back. She has all the herbs a Trini needs to 'flavour the pot'.
This woman will plant in anything: bricks, buckets, old sinks, anything. We also had a Julie Mango tree growing in the most awkward of spaces with concrete all around its base but it still managed to produce a lot of juicy mangoes every year that everyone in the house would fight for and fall out with each other over.
When I first met Samurai's family and started to visit the house in Central, things were different. First off their house is one of those really beautifully old, rustic, colonial type houses surrounded by lush greenery. It's really lovely and every time I left, I left with bag of fruits, citrus, cakes, provision, juices... and anything and everything his very generous mother had. It was just in her nature to give away and having a yard with many mature trees made it even easier. My sisters would joke and ask me if I went to the market with all of the stuff I brought back and sadly, there was still a fight for the mangoes I got.
So now we have a whole acre and I envision Samurai and I having our dream house with a large and mature garden filled with fruit trees and provisions and herbs and a little of everything. I picture us with children climbing the trees and stuffing their bellies with mangoes and pommerac. I want to be able to get up on a Sunday morning and pick most of the items for that day's meal from my yard, down to chickens and all.
Samurai also shared this idea but wanted to start this 'garden' before the house came so that when we do move in, we'll have some trees to live off of. We wanted to be as self-sustainable as possible seeing that our finances would be limited so we started gathering plants from my mother-in-law, Samurai's friends and a few plants shops. We also bought a few items from the Government farm in St Augustine. They had very little stuff at the time but their prices were really good.
Now, my mother-in-law has a rich yard, yes, filled with lovely trees and plants, Maneuvering through her yard, however, was a bit much because no landscaping or even little walk paths were incorporated pretty much like anyone's yard in these areas. In fact, many Trinidadians don't 'fuss' about landscaping but thanks to HGTV and DIY channel, however, I want that landscaping with neat little walk paths and well-manicured lawn. So Samurai's plan to just pelt tree like mad in the soil didn't sit well with me but he convinced me with the idea of having Starch and Julie mangoes to my heart's content so we tried our best to determine the proposed location for the house and began to plant outside of that area.
We also found out about this organic plant shop called WaSamaki not too far from our soon-to-be home. They were really nice and helpful with a lot of rare fruits and plants for sale on their farm that your Tantie and Mammy used to talk about but were so rare to find that the prices made them a one-time 'splurge' purchase just to try it.
Our land was covered in very thick brush. At first I was a bit despondent and wondered what the hell we were getting ourselves in to. The high razor grass, weeds and vines were so strong and think that it felt like you were walking in quicksand just to get through. The soild was another concern. It was thick clay soil, thicker than my legs!!! lol. It was sticking to my brand new gardener boots like if I was making a mold. I wondered if this soil would cause a problem to build a house on because just digging a hole took sooo much effort. We found a few treasures though. The soil was laden with earth worms which is great for drainage and for the plants. We also found several Tumeric roots and watching the land from the roadway, it was obvious someone used to plant here a lot.
Anyways, once a week for a few weeks we rounded up Samurai's brothers and we all went down to cut pathways in the bush with a weed whacker with the poor thing struggling to perform. The more we went, the more I realised that with a good clearing, care and planning, this yard will be so beautiful.
We planted:
Citrus trees (lime, grapefruit, orange)
Starch and Julie mango (a must)
Soursop
West Indian Cherry
Carambola
Coffee
Governor Plum (this was different to what we thought it was, the big juicy bumpy plums are apparently called Jamaican Plum)
Sapodilla
Tamarind (sweet)
Pommerac
Caimate
Guava
Bay Leaf
Ley Ley
and much more
I would never think gardening was such a great workout. I think I lost a pound or two every time we went to do some work. The only thing I didn't do was use that whacker. I think when we establish our garden I need a lawn mower (ride-on preferably) because that thing is not designed for my body so we made a deal for when we got the house that he washes the clothes and I will cut the grass.
In fact we made a few deals:
He cooks and I will wash the wares
He scrubs the bathrooms and I will sweep and mop
The pond next to the back of our lot was very large so a section of the land was a bit swampy from the water that seeped in. We planted a few coconut trees in this area. Throughout the entire acre we dug holes and planted and weeded. My mother even came once to help us plant some stuff but I think she underestimated the work involved, lol.
Samurai's mother started some Breadfruit trees plants for us by slicing the root of her tree with a cutlass which made new shoots. We went to plant two of them but the next two weeks when we returned, one disappeared and the other died. We tried another time and that one disappeared too. Strange. Could someone be stealing our plants?
After we planted most of the stuff we had, our visits were just to go back with the tray of the van filled with bottles of water for the plants. We had to walk back and forth along the length of this land to water these plants which felt like torture at times but a few of them were really striving and the pride from seeing these little babies grow was motivation enough to continue.
As it got closer to Christmas however, the gardening slowed down to not at all. So all the plants, dead, stolen or thriving were out there to fend for themselves until the new year.
Circa 2010: Architect in training
With the last purchase that fell through, I found the program "Live Interior 3D Pro" and I was hooked. I always wanted to learn AutoCAD and this appeared to be a simple version that allowed me to sketch a floor plan of our dream house and then view the 3D render as I went along.
I was able to walk through the entire structure and really tweak the details to my liking. I was using this program day and night until that sale fell through. I was no doubt an addict but when the sale crashed I was mad and deleted all designs I had for the property so until now, it just sat there on my laptop in the shadows waiting for me to abuse it again.
My secret affair with the software has since reignited with this land purchase and I am once again like a zombie up all night designing our dream house; adding furniture and practically living in this virtual house from my laptop.
Samurai had a few specifications for the house but outside of that, he basically gave me free reign on the design.
His demands were:
A very large kitchen (because he loves to cook)
An outdoor patio for entertaining friends
A tub in the Master Bathroom
Position laundry room on side of house where the breeze comes in
Space in the Laundry room to hang delicates instead of outside, lol
A game room
My demands were:
A space to do my art
Children/spare bedrooms not facing the main roads (in case some perv sees them changing through the window)
Space in the laundry room for the deep-freeze (those things are not for kitchens)
A separate TV room/living room (for Samurai to entertain people when I don't feel sociable)
Double vanity in Master Bathroom (because Samurai hogs the mirror way too much)
Strategic exits in house (because I'm paranoid and always need an escape plan)
So I am feeling like an architect and I'm 'Googling' every little detail about houses and pointers to make the costs lower and tips and tricks. I read that straight lines are cheaper to build than a lot of curved walls. Rooms with plumbing like the kitchen and bathrooms should all be grouped to the same side of the house and a smaller foundation with a two-story house is cheaper than a flat house with a large spread of foundation.
HGTV and the DIY channels have not helped with my excitement to start this house. Their shows make me feel like I can build this thing with my bear hands from scratch. I wish they could come down here and help me :(
Unfortunately though, there is very little information online on building concrete houses like we do here in Trinidad and Tobago so I'm basically going with the wind for that part. I did find www.sipreal.com, however, which provided me with a lot of valuable information in terms of the entire process to follow for building the house, so that is one outlet I have to guide me on at least the procedures, but I'm not too sure that this floor plan I'm developing is structurally possible *shame face*
Anywats, this lack of local information is what basically inspired me to start this blog in the first place.
I was able to walk through the entire structure and really tweak the details to my liking. I was using this program day and night until that sale fell through. I was no doubt an addict but when the sale crashed I was mad and deleted all designs I had for the property so until now, it just sat there on my laptop in the shadows waiting for me to abuse it again.
My secret affair with the software has since reignited with this land purchase and I am once again like a zombie up all night designing our dream house; adding furniture and practically living in this virtual house from my laptop.
Samurai had a few specifications for the house but outside of that, he basically gave me free reign on the design.
His demands were:
A very large kitchen (because he loves to cook)
An outdoor patio for entertaining friends
A tub in the Master Bathroom
Position laundry room on side of house where the breeze comes in
Space in the Laundry room to hang delicates instead of outside, lol
A game room
My demands were:
A space to do my art
Children/spare bedrooms not facing the main roads (in case some perv sees them changing through the window)
Space in the laundry room for the deep-freeze (those things are not for kitchens)
A separate TV room/living room (for Samurai to entertain people when I don't feel sociable)
Double vanity in Master Bathroom (because Samurai hogs the mirror way too much)
Strategic exits in house (because I'm paranoid and always need an escape plan)
So I am feeling like an architect and I'm 'Googling' every little detail about houses and pointers to make the costs lower and tips and tricks. I read that straight lines are cheaper to build than a lot of curved walls. Rooms with plumbing like the kitchen and bathrooms should all be grouped to the same side of the house and a smaller foundation with a two-story house is cheaper than a flat house with a large spread of foundation.
HGTV and the DIY channels have not helped with my excitement to start this house. Their shows make me feel like I can build this thing with my bear hands from scratch. I wish they could come down here and help me :(
Unfortunately though, there is very little information online on building concrete houses like we do here in Trinidad and Tobago so I'm basically going with the wind for that part. I did find www.sipreal.com, however, which provided me with a lot of valuable information in terms of the entire process to follow for building the house, so that is one outlet I have to guide me on at least the procedures, but I'm not too sure that this floor plan I'm developing is structurally possible *shame face*
Anywats, this lack of local information is what basically inspired me to start this blog in the first place.
Circa 2010: Cut-backs
We. Are. Married.
Two months later, Samurai and I are back from our honeymoon. The wedding experience was bitter-sweet. Bitter because I guess many couldn't understand or was willing to share in my joy but sweet because by the end of the night, I forgot about all of those issues, forgot about the killjoys, forgot about all the things that went wrong with the planning and arrangements and had a ball!
(straying from the topic here... don't ever consider that horrible hotel up on the hill for your wedding, they try their very best to rob you blind)
But it was soon back to reality when we returned from our honeymoon and shacking up with my mother. Samurai's employer was selling off some of their vehicles and saw the opportunity as an investment that would come in handy for transporting materials to and from the property instead of hiring someone. We purchased the van with an interest-free loan from my mother and planned to start building the next year (2011) when we paid it off and recuperated some of the money spent from the wedding.
We were now property owners with a large monthly loan installment to pay back. We had to therefore plan our spending and our budgets to adjust.
Our list of sacrifices:
Cut down on the amount of snacks (guilty)
Buy basic food stuff
Cook food over buying fast-food
No more gifts for each other
No more gifts for family and friends, except for small children
No more money for parties and fetes
No celebratory dinners for anniversaries, etc.
Reduce shopping (ugh)
It was kind of hard to change but we decided that we and others just needed to understand that this is something that is very important for us and without any savings, we will never have our house.
TTMF also has some rules with their land loan:
You must start construction within the first five years
You must take your construction financing from them
You must present a quantity survey with the application for the construction loan from their approved list of surveyors
So, we are literally living in a room in my mother's house. It is cramped and uncomfortable.
Sometimes I feel so depressed about it that I don't feel like cleaning it out for days. Sometimes I question the decision to have the wedding instead of using the money towards starting the house immediately. We could have just gone and gotten a 'government wedding' instead and forget about everyone else but then I remember how nice it was to be the reason so much family came together and was under one roof. Samurai and I have very disconnected family members and relationships so it was a rare occurrence that would probably never happen again. The memories of our attempt at a wedding dance and horseback riding together on a beach in the Dominican Republic are memories no-one can ever take away.
Living with regrets wouldn't solve our current living situation though, so sticking to a clear plan is what we really needed to start constructing our Dream House and Home.
Two months later, Samurai and I are back from our honeymoon. The wedding experience was bitter-sweet. Bitter because I guess many couldn't understand or was willing to share in my joy but sweet because by the end of the night, I forgot about all of those issues, forgot about the killjoys, forgot about all the things that went wrong with the planning and arrangements and had a ball!
(straying from the topic here... don't ever consider that horrible hotel up on the hill for your wedding, they try their very best to rob you blind)
But it was soon back to reality when we returned from our honeymoon and shacking up with my mother. Samurai's employer was selling off some of their vehicles and saw the opportunity as an investment that would come in handy for transporting materials to and from the property instead of hiring someone. We purchased the van with an interest-free loan from my mother and planned to start building the next year (2011) when we paid it off and recuperated some of the money spent from the wedding.
We were now property owners with a large monthly loan installment to pay back. We had to therefore plan our spending and our budgets to adjust.
Our list of sacrifices:
Cut down on the amount of snacks (guilty)
Buy basic food stuff
Cook food over buying fast-food
No more gifts for each other
No more gifts for family and friends, except for small children
No more money for parties and fetes
No celebratory dinners for anniversaries, etc.
Reduce shopping (ugh)
It was kind of hard to change but we decided that we and others just needed to understand that this is something that is very important for us and without any savings, we will never have our house.
TTMF also has some rules with their land loan:
You must start construction within the first five years
You must take your construction financing from them
You must present a quantity survey with the application for the construction loan from their approved list of surveyors
So, we are literally living in a room in my mother's house. It is cramped and uncomfortable.
Sometimes I feel so depressed about it that I don't feel like cleaning it out for days. Sometimes I question the decision to have the wedding instead of using the money towards starting the house immediately. We could have just gone and gotten a 'government wedding' instead and forget about everyone else but then I remember how nice it was to be the reason so much family came together and was under one roof. Samurai and I have very disconnected family members and relationships so it was a rare occurrence that would probably never happen again. The memories of our attempt at a wedding dance and horseback riding together on a beach in the Dominican Republic are memories no-one can ever take away.
Living with regrets wouldn't solve our current living situation though, so sticking to a clear plan is what we really needed to start constructing our Dream House and Home.
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